Ohh no... Not you again.

-hover-

You do it to yourself.

Los Angeles, CA




I’ll stop the world and melt with you
You’ve seen the difference and it’s getting better all the time
There’s nothing you and I won’t do
I’ll stop the world and melt with you😘

Anthems….

Uyama Hiroto - 81summer

A Son of the Sun (2008)

Interpol - “Narc”

this will be fun to see.

State of Manuel

Lately I’ve changed in a good way, I am way more responsible with stuff and I am dedicating a lot of time to myself, I’ve been working a lot, working out everyday, heck I’ve even stopped going out every night. No one had to tell me anything to make me come to this realization, I just realized everyday cant be a day to waste with friends, or a party day. Not to say that I have become someone who isn’t trying to have fun, but I am just trying to be happy with myself. I have found lately that I make a lot of time for people in my life, and not enough people even make time for me. I am always open for others not even caring about myself. I just realized after a couple days I am done with reaching out to people if they really want to talk to me or see me they will do it with their own will. I could be using all this time on myself. The people that i want to stay will stay with me and the people who will leave will leave, there is only so much I can control. I have just seen where my life is going and its been in a downward spiral since last year. Also, a thought that has been wandering in my head is when I will ever date someone else, and you know even if I was to have a girlfriend, I would want to be at a place where I can support myself before I can support another head. Because at this point in my life I am not trying to date someone for a little while, I am essentially looking for the person I am going to spend the rest of my days with and be happy forever, and if I even want to think of being happy I got to have my shit together. Because this is a dog eat dog world, so if you aren’t striving and doing something for your future then you’re wasting a whole lot of time, and time is a concept that has just slapped me in the face, If I want to be anywhere at all I have to pretty much do a bunch of boring hard crap before I can even have any fun at all. There is a quote that Derrick Brooks said once that stuck to me and I applied it to football everyday at one point, the quote was “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die” My heaven is way ahead of me, hopefully I can finally apply this to my life. I got a long road ahead of me, I won’t be around as much and I will probably be a very lonely person, but if that means that I can have a better tomorrow I am willing to do anything. I’m excited more than ever to see what awaits in front of me. I’ve held on tightly to the past for a while, and no matter how hard you try to hold on to it… its already done there is no direction to move but forward.

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